A little bit of Faith

It's time. Some of you figured it out in a blog that I wrote in September. This has been on my heart for a while.

I read a story by a mom named Sara who made a New Year's resolution for 2014: Tell them the REAL number. I loved what she wrote. No judgement in her words. Just sharing what she needed to do for herself. Not sure exactly what I will do in each unique situation, but I know what I will do at this moment. I will share a little bit of Faith.

Faith was to be born on December 25th, 2011. Amazing what a Mama's and Dada's mind can dream up for a little person in a matter of weeks. Who would this little one be? More like me or Jason? Blue eyed or brown? Artistic? Athletic? Musical? Mathematical? Then, dreaming big beautiful dreams for our family with a new addition... how to surprise family, how to tell the girls they were going to be big sisters, where to put the crib, having to buy a bigger vehicle, and the list goes on...

Then in a moment you know that those dreams will always just remain dreams. Your heart aches and your soul reaches... unable to grasp what you have hoped.

But in the midst of pain, there is always rejoicing. Because Hope walks with Faith. They hold hands, never letting go.

As Trinity and Eden laugh and dance as sisters here on earth, I do know that Halia and Faith do the same in paradise. 

I am a mother of four. Two beautiful babies in my arms and two beautiful babies in my heart.